獨處

Home Alone...


I am alone in this world...
There is so much around me; there is nothing around me...
I can see so far ahead, but I walk endlessly towards a destination I can't see...
I can't stop walking, for I know I'll be consumed by my surroundings...

看清

We can chart our future clearly and wisely only when we know the path which has led to the present...

Today, I finally changed the wiper blades of my dad's car... Renault Mégane's wipers are really difficult to change!!! My hand now hurts because of all the pulling and pushing... Guess that's the reason why I've procrastinated so much? Haha... Excuses...

There is a sense of satisfaction for doing something correctly but that is not enough to lift my spirits... I know but I didn't realise that I'm selfish, insensitive, irresponsible and give up easily at the first sign of difficulty... I didn't really give my best in the things that I do... I don't really deserve for anybody to love me, because I couldn't really care less if you love me or not...

I know I've hurt the person that I've love, the only girl that I had ever loved, the person whom taught me what is love... However, I still do not know how to love... This has hurt her and made it difficult for her...

I do know that I love myself more than anyone else, I only wish to concentrate on myself... Maybe I still do not see the need to be involved in a relationship? It's a good to have rather than must have... Previously I thought that it is a must have because I want to get married early, but that is very irresponsible because I'll never be able to give my partner what she deserves...

The danger of blogs are that they will pull the author into a downward spiral of self-pity... I better stop here...